When the affair partner threatens you or comes to your home

Even if it isn't urgent, start keeping records today. If you try to recall everything at once later, the dates and order become blurred.

• If you feel in danger, call 112 (the police emergency number) right away. Police will stop stalking that is in progress on the spot
• Before blocking the number, take screenshots of texts, KakaoTalk messages and call logs received
• Note the dates, times and places they came, and save footage from your door camera or dashcam
• Tell your child's school or your workplace about the situation and ask them to contact you if a stranger shows up
• Ask your spouse to cut off contact with the affair partner and to hand over any messages they received

• Meeting them in person to have it out
• Replying with insults or lines like "You'll regret this"
• Going to the affair partner's home or workplace in return
• Posting public warnings in comments on the affair partner's social media
• Paying money to make it quietly go away (once you pay, more demands may follow)

Stalking (스토킹) requires showing repetition, so the record gains strength as each incident is added. Note briefly, on the same day, the date, time, method, content and how threatened you felt.

Gather the contacts made to your spouse as well. If your spouse keeps responding to the contact, it may be harder to treat it as stalking, and in an affair lawsuit it becomes a sign the relationship is continuing. In that case, you first need to decide what to do about your relationship with your spouse before a response strategy can be set.

• Screenshots of messages and call logs showing the other person's number and the time
• Door camera and dashcam footage saved separately as original files
• Notes on the locations of CCTV near where they came (retention periods are short)
• Names and contact details of neighbors or coworkers who witnessed it

Unwanted approaches and contact that continue or are repeated become a stalking crime. It is punishable by up to 3 years' imprisonment or a fine of up to KRW 30 million, and since a July 2023 amendment, the offender can be punished even if the victim does not want punishment.

With the victim's consent, the police can refer the victim on the spot to a counseling center or shelter, and if repetition is likely and the situation is urgent, they can order the person to stay at least 100 meters away and not to call or message. The court can order provisional measures (잠정조치) including a written warning, a no-approach order, an electronic monitoring device and even detention in a police cell.

Words like "I'll tell your spouse" or "If you don't pay, I'll spread it" can amount to threats (협박) or extortion (공갈). Be sure to keep any message demanding money.

Once you file a criminal complaint, the police interview you as the victim. Submitting your organized records in date order speeds up the investigation, and if protective measures are needed, request them along with the complaint. If contact continues after the complaint, submit those records as well. Once the police investigation is complete, a prosecutor at the Public Prosecution Service (공소청) decides whether to indict.

If you are also preparing an affair lawsuit, the stalking and threat records can be submitted as evidence of the affair partner's attitude after being found out. We decide when to file the lawsuit while watching how the criminal case progresses.

Jisan Law organizes the record of contacts and visits with you, writes the criminal complaint, and considers whether emergency measures (긴급응급조치) or provisional measures are needed. Jisan Law accompanies you to your interview as a victim and continues on to handle the affair lawsuit. A managing partner handles the consultation personally.

If you are in danger now, call 112 first, then contact us through the chat on this page.